Cue lightbulb moment number one: The present is important. When it feels like my exhaustion is permanent, and that the stress and work is nonstop, I have to remind myself to tap the brakes. Don't rush through things; sit in the moment. Acclimate to it (even if it's uncomfortable).
Cue lightbulb moment number two: Surviving isn't enough for me. When my anxiety gets bad, which it has been for the past week and a half, I have to remember to seek out things I love. It's extra energy and effort, but happiness is worth it. Surviving the day isn't the ultimate goal, though sometimes that's all I can focus on. I want to find something significant to smile about. Usually, I find it in a book, or in my writing.
And, speaking of writing, let's talk about that a little more. Because I've mentioned it a thousand times already, but it's worth reiterating again and again until I start to fully practice what I preach. I love writing, and even if I get only enough time to write a chapter, my time feels well spent. I feel fulfilled. But writing is hard, so sometimes on my days off I forget to sit down and chip away at my current work in progress because when things aren't clicking, I flounder. But when it goes right...
Last week I wrote the next chapter of my current work in progress (TMoD). I went back to my old writing routine of lighting a candle, putting on my writing mix, opened the document, and got to work. I surfaced about two hours later with something I was really, really proud of. During my deep dive into the story, I found something I had been struggling to find, and I think I only found it because I finally stopped looking. Finally, finally, I found the core of my story! The beating heart of what I want this one to be about.
I don't want to share a long snippet again just yet, because I've been doing that a lot lately, but I'll share a little excerpt where I felt I'd finally hit my writing stride. It makes me very happy and very excited to get a chance to sit down and write more. Hopefully more lightbulb moments will come in my next writing session, and my love of this project will only grow.
She arrived next to him, gentle, still, and silent. It was a moment that was subtle in its significance, but inevitable in its occurrence. [...] Serendipity swept through the air, bringing a chill more unshakable than the November noise raging outside.
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